May 10, 2017

A Mother's Heart



Being a mom is nothing like I thought it was going to be, it is more on every level. More love, more heartache, more soul searching, more frustration and more pure joy than I ever thought was possible. Being a mom challenges me, makes me look at life in a whole new light and teaches me things every day. The bond between a mother and her child is unlike any other, it is special and unique. No two mom's are the same, no two parent the same way or have the exact same view points, yet Mom is the center of her children's world. She is the one who kisses owies, who's hugs make everything better, who knows just what to say and who can fix anything. Mother's are amazing.

Through my journey with motherhood and becoming a motherless mother, many things have changed, but several have stayed the same. 5 amazing women have stood by my side through it all. Not only are they my best friends they are outstanding Mom's. The ones I turn to for everything. They are there when I need advice, a shoulder to cry on, or when I just need to hear, "you are not in this alone." I can't believe how blessed I am to have these women in my life. With Mother's Day right around the corner, I wanted to sit down and talk to them about motherhood. The highs, the lows and everything in-between.

 “I realized when you look at your mother, you are looking at the purest love you will ever know.”- Mitch Albom


Noelle
Mom of two boys, ages 1 & 3 weeks.

What is your mom super power?
I used to be the type of person that I had to do one thing at a time, Now that my second baby is here, I feel like my multi-tasking skills have improved...and fast! I can make dinner, tame my toddler, get bottles ready, and get laundry folded all at once.  It's all about surviving over here and some days I can't believe I did it. :)

What is the best parenting advice you ever got?  
Before my second baby was born, a friend told me, to take as many pictures as you did with the first and to always remember,(on the tough days), that tomorrow is another day. This has stuck with me, I am constantly trying to be in the moment because I know how fast it goes.

Is parenting everything you thought it would be?
It's more. From the love I didn't think was possible to feel, to even the really hard days...you really can't prepare for it like I thought I could. 

How do you measure success as a parent?
If my kids are healthy, happy, fed, clothed and turn out to be good people one day...I will consider it a huge win for everyone!

What is one thing you want every parent to know?
To try and not be too hard on yourselves, there is no book on how to parent perfectly. Every kiddo is different and to try and not compare yours to another. With that said..it's also really important to take your own advice you dish out...which is something I need work on.

Sandy
 Mom of 2 boys, ages 6 & 2

What is your mom super power?
My mom superpower is empathy. Because of empathy I am able to be the best mom possible. Being able to empathize with my child when they are having a rough day, allows for the much needed patience that they need from me.  

What is the best parenting advice you ever got?  
Some of the best advice I received was “The dishes can wait, enjoy these moments.” This is something that I wish I would have listened to more. The other piece of advice is actually a quote that I read when I need to be reminded to slow down. “Hold him a little longer, rock him a little more. Tell him another story (you’ve only told him 4). Let Him sleep on you shoulder. Rejoice in his happy smile, he is only a little boy for such a little while.”

Is parenting everything you thought it would be?
Parenting is so much more than I thought it would be. It is so much harder. We do not live in the same town as most of our relatives. There are many times where having an extra hand would be so nice. However reminding yourself that you and your husband can only do so much in a day and that we need to take the time to play with our kids. Parenting has brought so much love that I didn’t know existed. You really can’t explain it to someone it just something you have to experience.

How do you measure success as a parent?
 I think this changes on a daily basis for me. Some days I measure success as does this feel right? At times, I may be making them unhappy about apologizing to his brother or by asking him to eat the smallest piece of broccoli. However I feel I am helping them grow as boys. On really hard parenting days I count success as, are they fed and dressed?

What is your proudest moment as a parent?
One of my proudest moments happened a couple of weeks ago. My six year old son is quite the particular eater. We were having lasagna with my in-laws. He did great with the lasagna, which can be a challenge some days. However my mother-in-law had brought some garlic bread and it was sitting on the table out of his reach. He got up on his chair and reached for the garlic bread. My in-laws and I tried to just act normal and go about eating our dinner. Normally when he tries something new he will take a bite, make a disgusted face, and that is it he’s done. However that night he ate half HALF! a piece of garlic bread! All the times that I have asked him to try something new or take another bite, take another bite, take another bite finally paid off! He finally tried something new all on his own!

What is one thing you want every parent to know?
I want every parent to know it is okay to worry about your child but try not to compare them to other children. I struggled with this for a long time and even spent thousands of dollars making sure he was growing appropriately. Sometimes I still catch myself comparing his small size to others. However quickly reminding myself that he is fine. He is his own person and he will catch up. 




Chelsey
Mom of two, ages 5 & 3

What is your mom super power?
The solver of all problems (at least my kids expect that- no pressure!)

What is the best parenting advice you ever got?  
Cherish the time you have with your kids, it goes by so quickly.

Address the heart of your child, not just their behavior.



Is parenting everything you thought it would be?

I honestly had no idea what i was getting into. It has been the most challenging thing I've ever done and also the most rewarding beautiful thing.  I'm pretty sure I've learned as much from my kids as they've learned from me.

How do you measure success as a parent?
It's a hard thing to do, especially in the little years. Sometimes just surviving the day is a victory. I suppose success is when I strive to teach them what's truly important in life, be consistent, and take time to have fun and enjoy each other.

What is your proudest moment as a parent?
When my children choose to be generous and loving to others.

What is one thing you want every parent to know?
This stage too shall pass.


Chelsie
Mom of 2 boys, ages 5 & 1

What is your mom superpower?
I am able to find resources in the community to get my kids the things they need if they are struggling a bit. With my current job, I have a lot of connections in the community to make sure my kids have the best people working with them.


What is the best parenting advice you ever got?
Your time as a person is so important. Having your own identity aside from your kids, work and family is so crucial. I am Chelsie who enjoys being a mom and wife, but it doesn't completely define me. I also have friends and activities I enjoy doing too. I am my own person and no one can take that away from me. It is important to know who you are and be comfortable in your skin because you have to live with yourself the rest of your life.


Is parenting everything you thought it would be?
I think it is better than I expected. I thought I would loose myself after becoming a parent or would never get any freedom. I always joke that I am the most independent I have ever been in my life and I am a wife and a mom at the same time. My kids and family are well taken care of and my needs are also being met at the same time. My husband is so supportive of me having my own identity and encourages me to be independent and confident in who I am.


How do you measure success as a parent?
Well my perfectionist side would say, having a perfect house in order, but I know that is not true. I have a really hard time just letting things go. It is something I am working on. I would say success as a parent, is helping my kids think for themselves. If my kids achieve something without me doing it all for them, that is success. I will be here to help guide them, but I can't control their every move.


What is your proudest moment as a parent?
I am most proud of Silas, still remaining mostly happy and silly, despite his challenges early in life with his arm. I am most proud of Malachi and the eccentric person he is becoming. He challenges me daily, but I love his excitement for life and it makes me proud to be his mom.


What is one thing you want every parent to know?
It is okay if everyone doesn't agree with the way you live. It's not about pleasing everybody else.


Kery
Mom of 2 girls, ages 6 & 3

What is your mom superpower?
I can down a glass of wine, at the end of the day, like no other! Kidding! I would think making my kids feel like they matter, and that they deserve love and so much of it. 


What is the best parenting advice you ever got?
Spend time alone as a new family, when you get home from the hospital. Just enjoy being a family with as little distractions as possible. You will never get those precious first weeks back, soak in every moment and bond with your new baby.


Is parenting everything you thought it would be?
Not sure if parenting is everything I thought it would be or if it is harder than I thought it would be. I love staying home, don't get me wrong, but there are days, especially when I have asked my kids 500 times to do something, where I think to myself "I wonder what it would be like to go to work." 

How do you measure success as a parent?
That my children know how much I love them, not what I buy for them, but how we spend our time together, baking cookies, playing play-doh, and being there for their 1st school concert. I want my kids to always know they can count on me and I will always be there no matter what. 

What is your proudest moment as a parent? 
My proudest moment as a parent is probably when my oldest looked at me and said, "you know mom, I love you and I think you do a great job taking care of me and Abby." My oldest and I butt heads a lot, so her saying that meant the world to me. That day I will always remember. 

What is one thing you want every parent to know?
You are good enough. Do not ever compare yourself to other moms because we all parent different in some way.

Mom's: no two are the same, yet we all have a common thread, we love our children fearlessly.
XOXO




5 comments:

  1. Motherhood is amazing and challenging and more than we can imagine, isn't it?! What a blessing that you have such wonderful friends with which to share the journey!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Motherhood is so much more! I am truly blessed to have such amazing friends in my life. It fills my heart with so much love and makes the journey a little easier.

      Delete
  2. So beautiful! Thanks sharing these awesome stories!!

    ReplyDelete